Marriage Advice, Part 5

The Fifth Idea for Marriage and Relationships is:

Money is the cause of many problems.

Where your treasure is, there will your heart be also. Sadly many people treasure money and it shows in the way they express their hearts to those they supposedly love. We are all very selfish people and marriage is an attempt of two people coming together in sacrifice for and service of the other with love. It’s very unnatural, but when accomplished, brings much joy.

In your relationship money can be the cause of many, if not most problems. Here are a few ideas to remember if you are thinking about getting into a relationship, moving towards engagement, getting married, or are already waist-deep in matrimony:

-Do not use credit cards and save up for big purchases instead of getting loans. Debt will haunt you and your partner for years to come and usually the blame rests and one person which can be the cause of much resentment and many arguments.

-Pay off your debt before entering a relationship or getting engaged (if possible).

-Completely divulge all of your debt and spending habits to your bf/gf before getting serious. Money can be the cause of major mistrust in a serious relationship.

-Never hide your spending! You should be able to ‘stand naked and unashamed’ in front of your spouse.

-Never have a separate checking or savings account- ever! You might as well tattoo “I don’t trust you!” on your forehead if that’s the selfish route you want to take with your marriage. You are supposed to be ‘one flesh’ and having separate bank accounts makes that impossible. The only exception here would be of your spouse developed some dangerous financial habits once you are married and you had to create an account where you could responsibly control your money in order to pay bills while your spouse was restoring trust. If a bf/gf is showing signs of dangerous financial habits (gambling, drug addiction, careless spending, major debt), then dump them. Remember, you get to choose who you spend the rest of your life with- it might as well be someone responsible.

-Budget, budget, budget…then stick to it.

-Save for the future and obtain life insurance to take care of your spouse upon your death.

-And finally (although there’s probably a thousand more things), give a consistent portion of your income before paying your bills to your local church. 10% is the best place to start. This is a Biblically established principle and your marriage and finances WILL be blessed for it.

One Responseto “Marriage Advice, Part 5”

1. sharongilo says:

   July 20, 2010 at 3:38 pm

   Great post and from my experience with couples, issues of such importance — nicely done
   http://www.ashortguidetoahappymarriage.com